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Tuesday, 31 May 2011

Friendship

This little blog of mine has been a little quiet of late because for the last couple of weeks I've been hosting my best friend Sarah here in Doha.

We had the most brilliant two weeks together laughing and catching up.

Sarah Squared out in the middle of the desert!


Sarah and I have been friends for almost 20 years and we know each other inside out. Her visit couldn't have come at a better time. A few days before she arrived I suffered a miscarriage - my 2nd in as many months and I knew that having Sarah around would cheer me up and help me get out of my slump. Sarah and I have been there for each other through some rough patches in our lives and we've always got each others back. The loyalty that we both have for each other is unbreakable and although we don't get to see each other very much we always pick up where we left off. 

Sarah said to me while she was here "Friendships are either for a reason, a season or a lifetime" our friendship certainly falls under the lifetime category. 

Do have have friendships that have only lasted a season? Have you ever had to end a friendship?

I have recently ended a friendship here in Doha. In May, Matt was retrenched from his job and it looked like we would be moving back to Australia. I had wanted to end this friendship for a while but found it very difficult to do as I don't like to hurt people's feelings, and I genuinely had a great time with her! I thought I could take the cowards way out when it looked like we were moving back home and just end all contact. However, thankfully Matt secured a new role here and we are now staying. Mmm but what to do about that friendship....

I have known for a while that this person wasn't a good fit for my life. I believe that friends should be loyal and no matter what is happening in their life you should support them and be there for them. I felt that I was always there for this person, I always had her back and encouraged her in whatever she wanted to do in life but I didn't feel I had that in return. My amazing husband made it crystal clear to me as I was struggling with the fact that perhaps it was me and not her. He told me to have a look at the people in her life and all that she had fallen out with and it made me realise that it wasn't me at all, that she had her own issues to deal with. Perhaps our friendship was for a reason. I learnt the true value of friendship and now look at my friends who I have had for such a long time and know not to take them for granted. I look at the new friends I have made after moving to the Middle East and look forward to them growing and lasting for a long time.

I think everyone has made mistakes in friendships, I know I certainly have! But I think there comes a time in life when it's not about the number of friends you have but the quality of your friendships and I believe they are like a marriage - you have to work at them to make them successful.

I now feel like a massive weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I feel free from the bullshit to put it bluntly!

So here ends a pretty heavy tale of friendship, and one I have debated for a while to write about but I think writing can be like therapy and you know what... I just needed to get that one off my chest!

x
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